Moto Luvr: Beater

Something to cut my mechanical teeth on.

In 2018 I went back to school for the 6th time. (Before that, there was my Bachelors in Fine Arts, then Masters in Fine Arts. Five years later: print and interactive design, 7 years after that: interactive design refresher, 5 years after that: something completely different - truck driving school, class A CDL w/ hazmat. Six years later again, after I retired at 48, here we are: Automotive technician.)

I had no background in wrenching, and I wanted to learn how to work on cars, as I already owned 5, and wanted to be a better steward of my car collection. I was tired of paying shops $120 an hour to work on them, so I enrolled in the Automotive Maintenance Technician Program (1 year, full time) at my local community college, MATC Oak Creek.

I bought this beater halfway through the program, as a lab rat of sorts. Here was a car I got for cheap off Craigslist, so I could practice my skills. I could risk breaking things, and the car would not be anything too precious. All my other cars were more valuable, and I would be more stressed about making mistakes on them.

Cherry on top: Custom license plate frame

Japanese battle flag sticker.

I have this on the rear side windows of all my Japanese cars.

Love the abstract design, flash of color, and repping Japan.

2000 Honda Accord Coupe EX

Why this car?

Criteria --- look cool, dirt cheap, reliable as possible.

I had formerly bought one of these cars new, just before 9-11. That was a silver EX V6. I guess I was still attracted to the body style, because here I was, 17 years later, trolling Craigslist for $1000 cars. I negotiated the car from $1200 down to $800 and bought it off a 25-year-old kid. It ran and drove good, 225K on the clock, so I was pretty happy with this deal. As can be seen in the photos the clear coat is flaking off, which I kind of like. It has a sort of "rat rod" patina. The path for this car was NOT to fully restore it, nor turn it into a performance machine. The idea was just simply to remove and replace factory components, as needed, for as cheaply as possible, and learn skills along the way.

I spent about another $1000 in parts, so far. Some things are Honda brand original equiptment, others cheap Chinese parts (depending on how vital the component is).

The first new car I ever bought, was this silver one, 18 years ago.

Day 1: The beater when I bought it.

Mid-July, and it was still wearing last winter's salt.

The work I did:

Restored the yellowed headlights: $12 (plastic polish and headlight coating)
Replaced 3 broken sway bar end links: about $65
Replaced exhaust system from the manifold back: $300 (flex-pipe, cat, factory style cat-back)
Replaced upstream and downstream O2 sensors: $110
Replaced broken passenger side view mirror $45
Black Plasti-dipped chrome window trim $15
Replaced cabin air filters: $8
Replaced PCV valve: $8
Replaced spark plugs: $20?
Replaced burnt out gauge cluster and dash bulbs with LEDs where possible: $17
Compression test: free. (6 count, dry #1-185 psi, #2-180 psi, #3-190 psi, #4-185 psi)
Serviced AC system refrigerant: free (loose Schrader valve was cause of no AC)
Mounted and balanced 4 tires $80 (Junk yard tires)
Timing belt and water pump replacement: $120 (Gates brand)
Valve cover gasket and repaint: $15
Upgrade headlight bulbs to LED: $15

Drain and fill:
Oil and filter: (Mobil One high milage full synthetic)
Coolant (generic green)
Automatic transmission fluid (Honda OE)
Power steering fluid (Honda OE)
Brake fluid (generic DOT 3)

I paid a shop $150 to tint the windows to complete the look.
Seat belt buckle was replaced at dealer (bad switch) : free, lifetime warranty

Currently about to replace gas tank, as it has a hole rusted in it. Probably fuel lines as well. (See end of post)

Headlight restoration: before on right, after on left.

Up on Jack stands about to replace sway bar end links and exhaust

Old exhaust taken off in one piece.

Holes rusted through here and there.

New exhaust: total cost about $300.

All cheap Ebay stuff, works fine.

Tires that came with the car were bald, and scary in the rain.

Replaced them with 4 mismatched junkyard tires: $20 each.

Good condition, all 2-3 years old, 60-70% tread left.

Solar brand? Never heard of it. I'll take it.

New cabin air filters next to the old ones.

I wondered if they were the original to the car.

EX trim leather interior is in decent shape.

There are 2 small rips on the drivers seat that don't really bother me.

Timing Belt & water pump job.

I followed the manufacturer's step by step for this job, via access to ShopKey Pro.

Nice that it has the factory torque spec for every fastener.

Example: ShopKey screen shot for the one motor mount that needed to come off.

my notebook checklist for this job.

I also studied this YouTube video of the exact same job.

The timing and balancer belts finally exposed

Gates brand, new timing and balancer belts, tensioner pulleys, water pump with gasket, and springs.

A happy moment when I finally got the crank pully bolt off. It laughed at my 25" breaker bar (w/ cheater pipe). The torque spec for this bolt is 180 ft. lbs., that's with the threads and mating surface (as per instructions) lubricated with oil. So after being tightened for like...10 years, I needed a torch (don't melt the rubber harmonic balancer) and my buddy's 1200 ft lbs. impact wrench to loosen it.

The halfway point. everything old is removed, and now to reassemble with new components. Tensioning the timing belt is critical. Too tight and it makes a whirring noise, too loose and it could skip

Old and new water pump and tensioners.

The lower timing belt cover gasket fell apart on disassembly (long exposure to heat and oil) so I had to go to the dealer and order a new one. This little 15" silicone rope is $30.

When there is no aftermarket, the dealer has got you by the balls.

since the valve cover had to come off anyway I decided to restore it.

Old valve cover gasket was hard as a rock, and took a while to get off.

Now cleaned and ready to be stripped.

ready to be primed and painted.

Aluminum hi-temp paint and clear.

.....Still is a nasty looking engine bay.

Click here for update blog post on the beater: Gas tank, fuel line, and brake line replacement

I have had a check engine light (CEL) for a little while, meaning that I cannot pass emissions, and therefore I have expired tags on my car until I fix it, (if this was an OBD1 car, it wouldn't be a problem). the P1456 code indicates a large leak on the tank side of the emission control system. I can smell gas under the car, and see what looks like a rusted seam in the tank. I'm going to replace the tank and see if my CEL goes away. If not, there may also be a stuck valve or bad solenoid in the vapor lines. I'll cross that bridge if I come to it.

New gas tank, straps, and gaskets.

I have heard that one aspect of Japanese Shintoism is the belief that all objects have their own souls or spiritual essence. (although I don't know a lot about the concept). If that is the case, what kind of battered souls do beaters have? To some extent, I DO think of cars as living things. How can you be a car lover, and NOT feel that way?

This is about beaters, generally.
I would be picky about what kind of beater I would want to drive. I like beaters with an even patina, and age, showing throughout the car. Like selecting a pair of new jeans that are ripped... just so, and weathered to look like you've had them forever.

I did buy my own beater. (to view that post click here) I was quite picky about getting my own beater. After all, how do you approach buying a beater, that should look like a beater, when you can afford to go buy a new car? The instinct would always be to buy the best looking car for the money. There was no good reason behind the purchase (i.e. I'm getting something cheap for my 16-year-old to drive.) My criteria was: it had to be dirt cheap, look cool, and be as reliable as possible.

A gray man's beater

What makes a beater? High miles, Body damage, mismatched panels, Peeling paint, duct tape, hefty bag windows, donut wheels? In one way, I feel beaters can be cars that are not in bad condition, but rather, they are obsolete looking. Not desirable at all, even when they were new. They are the automotive equivalent of "gray man theory". Inconspicuous. The perfect private investigator car. To be driven when you want to blend in with the surroundings.

Steve Buscemi from Fargo. "tan Cutlass Ciera!"

Han from Fast Five

"A chameleon. Someone who can blend in anywhere."

If The Walking dead Zombies drove...

I would not want to own a beater with serious body damage. But I DO like to look at such cars. Not sure why. Maybe it’s like the morbid fascination of watching a train wreck happen. A train wreck that is the owners life. I mean really... how bad is your life if you’ve been driving around with caved in doors and a hefty bag window for a year, or driving around on your donut for a month?

Pretty bad.

One thing all beaters have in common, is what they say about the owner…”Struggle”

Here are some examples of cars that have a very beat up appearance, body damage, corrosion, decaying flesh, etc...

Rockin' the donut!

Real Craig's list cars for sale.

Private party sales on Craigslist say a lot about the owner. A dealer will know enough to wash the car before taking photos. Some owners don’t know or don’t care. They are not going to lift one finger to make this sale happen. These were pulled right from Craigslist ads. These photos were meant to function as "advertisement eye candy" to lure in a buyer. No attempts were made at tire shine here. Notice ad picture of car buried in snow. Helpful.

I love how telling the environment is, in some cases. A wasteland environment.

Right at home in the trailer park.

Sometimes just sticking the camera out the front door, and snapping a pic of it in the driveway, complete with garbage strewn around, and run over toys.